Mother's Heart

I don't wish for her to make the team one day. I don't long for her to be popular or win contests. She will accomplish much, but that is not what matters to me. Her life is more than being my daughter, and more than the achievements she will earn. I don't even hold a passion for her to make top grades or be aligned with the right schools. She's so smart at 20 months, but I'm not concerned with that either. While these things aren't bad by any means, they will come with seeking first His Kingdom and His plan.

No, I don't hope, wish, or even pray for these things, but for her to find her safety and security on the lap of her Heavenly Father.
I long with my whole heart for her to be so ridiculously passionate for her King that all her other passions are reflecting Him.
I yearn that she has a faith that shines and glows everywhere she goes so that others wonder why she is filled with such inexplicable joy.
When life pushes her around (because it will), I pray that she knows where to look and Who to reach to.
I pray she is surrounded with friends who push her to be full of the fervent faith that is disappearing from our world.
I don't want anything to matter to her as much as the things of Heaven.
I want her to reach the broken, love the outcasts, and set the alternative for what this world has to offer to those who need to see it.  
God, touch this little one to follow in the passions of Your heart.

Why We Value Kids in Church

 
Sometimes I have a hard time trying to figure out why our kids don't matter as much as they should in our churches. Here is why I think they should:

1) They are our future. Our kids will be the next generation of the church. On an single church basis, they will one day be a deacon, an elder, the secretary, the youth pastor, the pastor...I grew up surrounded by awesome kids programs and I have strong belief that those programs are a lot of the reason I hung on to the idea of church. I grew up in our GEMS program, which was amazing being that I was never an outgoing kid. Every summer I looked forward to VBS programs and having fun learning Bible verses in a way I could understand - and I hold on to some of those today in the same way as I learned them then. Youth group was huge for me too. I don't think I would have ever went to church without going to youth group. Now, I'm the secretary of a church and am a huge advocate for our kids. The impact of kids' ministries is so important and real!


2) Catch the kid, catch the parents. This one sounds creepy, but it's true. Kids who love kids' church will bring their parents to church. When they go home and rant to mom and dad about Wednesday night Awana or GEMS, parents tend to want to see more. Sometimes, kids will drag their parents to church because they don't want to miss Sunday School. Parents love that their kids are taken care of and show great respect for churches that put kids first. Now that I'm a parent, this is a MUST for us. If I know my baby is being taken care of in a safe place and will grow up learning some life-applicable teachings from God's Word, that is a win in my book.
Safety is a must too. By safety, I mean no random adults wandering through my child's classroom and area. Just because everyone knows Joe Smith in the church doesn't mean the first-time dad knows him, and he shouldn't be just walking through his kids' area unless he works with the kids and has proof of it. If Joe Smith is an elder, first-time dad doesn't know that and will probably look twice and wonder why they're in there. Same with anyone not wearing Children's Ministry ID and attire. A safe place for JUST kids is a must. (See more about that below). Turn off the safety, you might as well turn on a big sign saying "we could care less about the kids of our church". This is the biggest turn off for new parents.


3) Kids will be the next generation of the Good News. Kids pick up on everything. They will grow passionate about God if they see how passionate we ware about Him and how much we care about them learning about God. God tells us to teach His Word to our kids, and when we fail to pass that along, we miss the mark and we face a dying generation of the Word. How is this not important? Proverbs 22:6


4) We learn from children. The faith of a child is the purest and most open. Adults put on the blinders, create biases, and question every word they hear and read. Kids take things as they hear and see them. When we approach God in such a way, we are so open to His imprinting and molding of our lives. This is why it is also important to teach children while they are young and open. Matthew 18:2-4


5) Jesus commands us to value our kids. Check out Matthew 18:2-6. It speaks for itself.



What we should be doing about it:

1) Give kids their own, safe place to come. Just like us as adults, kids love to go to church when there is something for them. Many adults love to go to church...when there is something they can take away. I heard this conversation just this week. Yes- we need to go to give back to God too, but growth is a very important aspect of this too. If we cram our kids in the smallest room in church and have it packed full of stuff made for adults, what does that say about our value for our kids? Safety, as I ranted about above is HUGE.


2) Kids need new, exciting, curriculum. This can be a tough one in churches because curriculum is so much of the cost. But, how much does your church pay to have a pastor  teach a new message each week? I doubt the pastor uses the same messages year after year. I'm pretty sure if he did the people would probably start seeking another place of worship. How is it any different for our kids and youth? We need to value our adults, but I believe we need to value our kids even more. Giving them fresh, new stuff each year is a big part in creating the excitement in them for Children's Ministry.


3) Value those who value the kids. Volunteers and staff who work with our kids and youth are detrimental in growing faith-filled kids. It's hard to know the background kids come from and the adults that are in their lives, but you can guarantee they are getting some positive influence through the people at their church. This is to be a constant in their inconsistent worlds, and that is so valuable to our kids today. Treat volunteers and staff as inferior who work with our kids and you might as well kiss your quality kids and youth ministries goodbye.


What do you think?

My Essential 6

It's been a year...wow. One year ago this very Sunday evening I was helicoptered to Grand Rapids with a 7-inch pulmonary embolism (yes, I have a picture of it), unsure of whether or not I'd live to see the next day. In that time I learned so many things, including just how much of a keeper my husband is and just how many people we have that care about us. I can't even express how many people I had coming from all walks of life pouring into me and my family during that time. Probably people I didn't even realize were pouring into us were. But as I reflect back on that entire process and part of my journey in life, I have learned some other very valuable things. I call them my "Essential 6" as I carry myself through this world:

1. Christ will always be my center. Period. He is always my number 1. When He is my number 1, nothing else in this world can touch me. I have always strived to make Him my number 1, but after all of this, I realize that as long as I keep Him number 1, I don't have to care what others think of me or what in this world can possibly harm me. No matter what happens in this life, He is always there and He will carry me through.In turn, because He is the center of my life, everything I do is with and through Him. I enjoy the things I love, but glorify Him and thank Him through and for them. Anything that could possibly compromise Him being the center of my life or take away from Him, I count out. Do I still slip up? Of course. But refocusing myself from time to time is always in order anyways. With Christ at the center, nothing will ever ruin me.(Matthew 6:33; Romans 8:31)


2. Nothing is impossible with Him. I repeat, NOTHING. I wasn't supposed to have my own child, and I did. I probably shouldn't have survived a 7-inch pulmonary embolism, and I did. I have a rare heart defect that faced tough odds back in 1986, but I overcame that. Why? Because HE did. Because nothing is impossible with Christ. He will bless you immensely if you just put your all into Him. I won't lie when I say that these things were a hard hill to climb, but beating the odds feels pretty good and I know that doing that myself would have ended in failure. Simply saying "I trust You, Lord" isn't always simple at heart. But when you truly believe He can overcome, things change. (Matthew 19:26)


3. Forgiveness is a must. I can't tell you how many times I've seen people hold grudges that last their lifetimes. Grudges are held against other believers, family members, non-believers, friends, etc. I see these people literally fall apart in character and spirit because they let one person's opinion or actions get to them so deep. Grudges, I have learned, never hurt the person you have them against, they hurt you. I have learned that life is too stinking short to live in such misery of a grudge, especially if it's against a family member. I have disagreements with people all the time and many I would love to just dangle over their heads, but I have come to learn that for the sake of my health and for the sake of the faith, I have to either admit I'm wrong or agree to disagree. I know there are the "non-negotiables" when it comes to the faith, but when you've beaten the dead horse over and over again, and the opposing party knows your stance on it and still won't budge (on an individual level), you just need to agree to disagree and move the heck on. Fighting about it constantly puts a bad taste in someone's mouth about how Christians really are. Grudges tend to get in the way of love. And speaking when you don't have love behind your words is just annoying. (ask 1 Corinthians 13) You don't have to accept a lifestyle, but sometimes you just need to back off if they know where you stand already.(Ephesian 4:31-32)


4. Humility is key. This ties in with number 3.When you let go of your pride and allow humility to soak through every situation and relationship, things end up going so much smoother. Sometimes, you need to count yourself as less before you can build others up - not in a demeaning, hate yourself kind of way, but in a "I don't know it all, and I need Christ to grow me" sort of way. Going into something with a prideful attitude turns others off. In my experience, working with people, no one wants to be approached with your "I'm right, you're wrong" attitude. Rather, they seem to respond better to a "how can I help you" attitude. Of course, in a fallen world, you will find people that take advantage of you and do everything they can to drain you of what resources you have. That is where the "God doesn't help those who don't help themselves"mentality could come in as helpful. Humility and strength is how Jesus taught, and it is huge in growing today. (Philippians 2:3)


5. Trusting in Him will bring you the best blessings. There was a time before Lucy came that I really questioned what God wanted me to do in the kids department. I struggled with not knowing if I should pursue having my own children or giving it up on the spot. I always had a glimpse of God when I thought about this, however. I can't really explain it, but it was almost a voice in the back of my mind saying, "Just trust Me". And let me tell you, it was the hardest thing for me to just let go and let God. The fact that I became pregnant so quickly though, was an indicator of exactly what God wanted of me. It is the best decision and the hugest blessing He could have ever given me, and without trusting Him, I wouldn't have Lucy. So when you question your next step, turn to God and allow His perfect plan to flow amazing blessings on you, because our plans may seem great, but His are far greater. (Proverbs 3:5-6)


6. We have no time to waste. This one is my biggest conviction, and perhaps my biggest challenge, but getting our faith stories out there to a world in desperate need of God's love is huge. Your life is short (trust me, I know), and any day it can be taken from you. It can be a living testimony to someone near to you, whether you know it or not. Your story is the most effective way of getting His love out there. Tell it and share how God has moved in your life. Don't let the "crap" that happens to you become a hurdle to your faith, but another chapter in your story and how Christ used it to strengthen your faith. The time is now. (Luke 8:39)


I thank you all again for your continued prayers and encouragement in my life. I hope that Christ can use me to be a light for Him, because He has sure used all of you as I have endured quite a year. Look forward with the tools He has given you, but don't dwell on the hardships of your life without using them to move ahead.

Everyday Choice

Faith is more than one big moment.
At some point in your life, you may have decided to say "yes" to the question "do you want to ask Jesus into your heart?" You prayed a prayer after someone who sat with you. Maybe you knelt at an alter, or came forward at a youth rally. Perhaps you wanted to ensure you wouldn't go to hell, so you simply said you'd be a Christian. But what they didn't tell you is that your Christian faith is more than "the big moment".
Don't get me wrong at all. The Bible clearly says, "if you confess with your lips that Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved." But what happens to those people who "fall away"? Why do so many high school kids say "yes! I want to be a Christian!" then spend the next 3 years avidly attending youth group and every trip offered, only to do a complete 180 in collage and suddenly not care about the passion they once had in Christ? I've seen it over and over again.
I think one reason is because we highlight the "big moment" of coming to Christ. We say here is all you need to do (and it is all you need to do) to be a Christian. But what about when life suddenly slams you in the face? Where is the "big moment" then? What about when the grades fall, the job is lost, the loved one dies, the life falls to pieces? I hear many people say "where is God when...?" Though those things can be hard to explain, it's important to know that He is in the same spot you left Him when you had your "big moment". The only difference is that you were seeking Him, rather than waiting for Him to come to you.
Everyday is a choice. Everyday we must say "yes" to God. Just because we celebrated saying "yes" ultimately to God in that early relationship with Him, doesn't mean you'll have a "big moment" everyday of your life. Life will still have days that drag. It will still have days that leave you in tears, or laughing, or just another day like yesterday at the same job, picking up the same toys, and studying for the same class.
Everyday, you must choose to say "yes, God. I trust you with this day." Then you must live your day in that mentality. He will open the door to those that seek Him. But, you must seek Him. You must ask Him. You must pick up your cross daily. 
Luke 9:23 says "Then He said to them all: 'Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow Me."
It's right there. We can seek God out and choose to say "yes" to Him everyday, or we can sit around, waiting for Him to show up on our terms and never stretch our faith.  You know you have mature faith when you can grow it in the good, the bad and they mundane. Seek Him daily.

 "Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.  For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened."
Matthew 7:7-8



"If you look for Me wholeheartedly, you will find Me." - Jeremiah 29:13

Why I Can't Move On - Keep Singing "Oceans"

I've been off my game lately.
I'm not who I was, and while the Johnson&Johnson saying goes "having a baby changes everything", I've been struggling with more than just the life-changes that come with having a baby.
I have found myself caring less about the everyday complaints from people. It's not that I don't feel for them as a person, but I find many things in life to not matter anymore. Who cares about something like wall colors, carpeting, and music style when there is something so HUGE we've been entrusted to?
I am walking so focused through life lately, and it isn't always a good kind of focus. I fail to see the needs around me at times, and become so task-oriented, rather than faith-oriented. I get so bent out of shape when I have a to-do list filled with necessary (I think), yet daunting things. I can't help but look at my life and ask "am I seriously making a difference by replying to emails, cleaning the house for the 100th time in a week, and typing up reports?" (I seriously feel like a lunatic lately.) Any moment can take me away from this life. I have learned this lesson hardcore this year, and now I have so much more at stake. Sometimes I feel as if no one really, truly understands. I can try and sort out my ...feelings (uhhg), and write things that rant on and on and on, and post ridiculous statuses on social media, but deep down, no one will get it. They can say they do, but they don't.
We all have something welling up inside that no one will ever completely understand. We can act in ways that people think are immature, but in reality, they have no clue where you've been and the storms you've faced. No one, except Him.
God knows exactly what is on your heart and mind. He can pick you up on those days that no one seems to notice or care or understand. I've been missing those God-encounters and not being able to find the time to open His Word in so long has caused me to feel empty. I reflect back a lot, if you haven't noticed, and recall 7 months ago when I faced one of the heaviest, yet exhilarating times of my life. (Ok, let's face it - it was THE heaviest and exhilarating time of my life...) And while I don't ever wish to undergo so much stress and pain again, I miss the growing I had during that time. I think I wait around for the big encounters because those are the ones that move me the most lately, but that doesn't HAVE to be the way it is.
He is with you during your smallest, most intimate moments and your biggest, most drastic moments. I believe that everyday God is calling us upon the waters where we may fail, no matter how big or small our challenges are.
When I was called to walk on the water, I really didn't have much choice. However, we always have a choice, even in circumstances where everything is out of control. Believe it or not, water represents "chaos" in the Bible, and circumstances we face can certainly be full of chaos. God calls us into the chaos. Crazy, huh? But if you think about it, those are the moments we grow so deeply in Him. Don't get me wrong, some people may choose to reject faith and God when they endure chaos, and even blame Him. But God has made chaos so that it can end up beautiful. He calls us to follow Him in the midst of it, and if we sink, He'll reach out to us. We only need to keep our eyes on Him.
So whenever I sing "Oceans" in church, at home, in the car, etc. I am reminded that God will not fail me no matter where He calls me. He will give us the strength, the courage and the faith to step out of the boat, and to keep our eyes on Him in the midst of chaos. When the "Oceans rise" aka: chaos, whether it be the heaviest chaos of your life or just a case of the Monday chaos, we can keep our eyes above it and be led by the Spirit. When we do that with the little things, we can trust Him in the biggest of challenges. Keep singing "Oceans". God will guide you through whatever chaos life brings, and He will make you stronger through it.

Busy Christianity

If you're like me, you say "yes" or "ok" a lot to people who ask you for things. Perhaps, also like me, you like to have control over every aspect of your inner circles - whether that be your job, your family, your ministry, etc. Did you know that saying "yes" all the time can actually end up being a sin?

When you reluctantly say "yes" to a request that you could probably care less about, but feel like you should care about, or something that someone absolutely "can't live without you" on, you are saying "no" to so many other things. It's true. You say no to your family time, your personal time, maybe even your God time. I've pushed these things aside more than I ever would like to confess because of the heart-wrenching "please do this for me".

A quote that I came across hit me so hard, it practically knocked the wind out of me because of the blatant truth it stated:

It was after I read this quote, that I realized God never wanted us to sign up to do all of these "good things" for Him. While those things are wonderful and we are asked to be servants for Him, a relationship with Him is the best place to be. When you don't even have the time to talk to Him and listen to Him, that isn't much of a relationship. We are to serve in the places He calls us to serve, and that is it. And that is ok.

I always feel so guilted into things. Working in a church makes it easy for that to happen on a daily basis. I bring work home. I do work in the morning before going to work. Come home from work, throw dinner in the oven, chomp it down before heading off to another meeting or group. Come home from said meeting or group, put Lucy to bed, or come home after she's already been put to bed, then drag myself to bed while trying to turn my brain off for the day, only to get up and repeat the process.
Sunday mornings are worse.  I go to more meetings on a Sunday and get asked more things than one person can ever take on than any other day of the week. Perhaps I'm over-stepping my bounds, but that is the reality of life. Why is that ok?

The question I have is "how did it get this way?" Why did it become the "norm" to be so busy? I've had so many people tell me "that's life". Why? Why does that have to be life? Sure, I brought many things upon myself, saying "yes" to everyone because it was "important" or because "it's my job". But every meeting you attend will be "important" to someone. What we are missing is what is ultimately important - a relationship with Jesus.

Yes, we are trying to win a community and a world over for Him, but when people look at us being busy, overwhelmed workers, who will ever want to jump on that band wagon? I see it as the oxygen mask on the air plane. If you aren't building up your relationship in Christ by being in the Word daily and praying to Him daily, how in the world will you lead others to Him? What kind of example is that?

So next time you are tempted to say "yes", consider all that you say "no" to.

Leadership isn't Loud

There has always seemed to be a bias about leaders being loud, boisterous people who can make beautiful public speeches and order people around.
In fact, I avoided leadership roles just because of this misconception I had throughout high school and college. It wasn't until I worked at Portage Lake Bible Camp that I learned I am a leader, no matter what I thought.
I recall a morning where we ran a large group game time for kids while parents were attending chapel services. Since I was a director (of ropes), it seemed like everyone on staff was looking to me to tell the 50-some kids what to do. I don't have a loud voice - let's just put that out there now, so as you can imagine, calling out to that many kids under the age of 13 was interesting. Luckily, other staff saw I wasn't overly comfortable or gifted in this form of leadership. So I suggested games, they explained it to the kids.
The other aspects of my job that summer though, worked wonderfully. I could lead smaller groups at their level and gave expectations for the staff I oversaw, all without ever raising a voice or putting on the "holier than thou" personality.
I look back on the summers I counseled and directed and see that I was indeed a leader, whether I recognized that at the moment or not. I think the instant you make the decision to follow Christ, and people know you are a Christian, you become a leader, whether you like it or not. Though it doesn't seem fair, your every move is judged. People watch you. It's not always that they are waiting for you to do something wrong as a Christ follower, but they will know it if you do.
Everyone you encounter will use you to add to their opinion of Christianity and Jesus. Everything you say, do, how you treat people, whether you "say" you're a Christian but do nothing to prove it - it is all judged.
So my question for you is this: How are you portraying Jesus to those around you? Maybe you're a teenager who talks back to your parents when you're home, but puts on the angel glow in public. Perhaps you tell everyone that you believe in Jesus, but proceed past the need for food in a local food pantry. Or maybe you gave your life to Jesus back when there was that huge, emotional moment in your life because it felt like the right thing to do, but now you sit around, waiting for another huge moment when God will show up. Who ever said He needs to show up? "Seek and YOU will find." Rather than talking about it, are you doing it? 
Moses couldn't speak well, yet he was one of the most influential leaders in the Bible. Jesus preached to the masses, but He served with humility. You don't have to be a sound speaker or a pushy person to be a leader. Being an example and serving make great leaders. Christ-followers are to be Jesus to those around them. What are you being?